The Blog of M Night Shymalan: TO ALL MY FANS:YOU'RE WELCOME

[Metalbender92]

Yeah, and my nephew Archibold got me to write Signs (sarcasms)! Puhleez. That's just for the press, makes me look like a family man.

And thank god for military schools!

[Metalbender92]

Sunday
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So I tried getting Frankie some Tour The France tickets, but they were sold out. I called Lance Armstrong for some tickets and he said "There's nothing I can do, and I lost all respect in your work after Lady in the Water". I'd like to shove his kickstand up his @$$, that's what I'd like to do!

Anyway, I tell Frankie I'm sorry and that I tried getting him tickets, but he said I was lying! He said I never tried to get him a trip to the Tour The France and that I only said sorry so he wouldn't leave TLA! And I say, "Well if that's how you feel about it, go ahead and quite!" And he says "Quite?" and I say "I meant quit".

So now I've lost my producer, and my best friend...

Cept for you, Newt, you F###in' rock!

[Metalbender92]

Since Frankie quit, I thought I'd get a GOOD producer for my movie. Well I was lucky, cuz I got 2!



They are so cool, and, they're like 10 times cheaper. All I had to do was give them bail money!

Frankie'll wish he never left...

[Metalbender92]

As I used to say in my bachelor days, "I've got a very special poll waiting for you"!

See, Griff and T-Bone aren't very good producers. They're very kind people, but they have trouble staying on task. Griff keeps offering to go to the bank for me, and T-Bone is so eager to baby sit my kids that he can't focus during production meetings. I don't want to let them go, but we're already a month behind schedule and we can't afford to lose any more time.

So my question is, should I fire them? And who should I get as a producer if I do?

[Metalbender92]

Okay, I was about ready to meet Griff and T-Bone to discuss the trilogy budget when I got a text. And this is what it said!

Griffen82:Cant come 2 meeting, got a job 2 pull
MNS123: what do u mean, this is ur job
MNS123: get over here now uguys
MNS123: im not playing.......
MNS123: u dont like me when im angry lolz
T-Boner: i cant find the key 2 ur hous
MNS123: behind the plant on porch. then come to production meeting, k?
MNS123: bring back some advil u guyz, sirens r killing me

[Metalbender92]

I'm sorry I am posting multiple times in a row. I just really enjoy updating this, even if no one's reading it, and I just don't want to wait for comments.

Well, after 2 days, the poll was tied, and I had to make a decision. I could either keep both of my producers or fire T-Bone. After they ditched my meeting yesterday, I thought that if I got rid one one of them, the other producer would be more focused on the film. I was ready to sack T-Bone.

Except they didn't come back.

I waited with the cast for 3 hours in the rain. Jackson was freaking out about his hair getting wet, and Dev's scar makeup was dripping into his mouth. Finally, Noah whispered to me, in his comforting Irish brogue," Ther' not commin' matey". And I knew deep down that he was right.

When I get to me house, I was shocked. The front door was kicked down, and the furniture was overturned and broken. My wallet and check book were gone! When I called the bank, a woman told me that 2 men had withdrawn the remaining 75 million dollars from the TLA budget account. She said that one of them was a handsome white male who looked cool in hats.

So now we have 2,00 dollars to finish the trilogy, we're 2 weeks behind schedule, and we have no producer. I'm f###in depressed you guys.

[trailerman]

I'm sorry I am posting multiple times in a row. I just really enjoy updating this, even if no one's reading it, and I just don't want to wait for comments.

Kidding ? I enjoy it

[absinthe_spoons]

Oh, I'm loving this. It's very creative and funny.

[Metalbender92]

Why thank you! Sorry, just thought I had lost some people. Felt bad about sixtuple posting (or whatever it is). Found out that someone on avatar spirit is pretending to be m night too, but I'm going to keep doing this anyway. They aren't doing a blog, so I don't feel too bad about it

Last night I got an email from Frankie.

Lance told me what you did. I'm sorry I called you a liar. I'm sorry that I quit. I'm sorry that I drew a picture of you pooping on the back of a leaflet.

Can I be your producer again?

So we're best friends again! I was so happy. I told him I was sorry, and he told me he was sorry, and then we both got totally wasted down in his basement.

Frankie told me that Lance Armstrong offered to sponsor TLA since Frankie's his number 1 fan. But he said we had to change the title:

M. Night Shymalan's
The Last Airbender
Sponsored by Lance Armstrong

I really hate it, but at least we got some money for the trilogy. We really need it, because Griff and T-Bone made off with our mechanical Appa.

[Metalbender92]

Well, we're finally back on track with TLA. It was so funny, because we've been filming scenes from the episode "The Waterbending Scroll", but we forgot that Peltz had been sick for the past week. Oh well, no one will probably notice.